Does it feel like your family gangs up on you? That you are always the odd one out no matter how nice. Kind, or thoughtful you are. Does it feel unfair when your family is rude and maintains a smear campaign at your expense?
Is your self esteem low?
The struggle is real. It may look like your family is great to the outside world. This rings true when one or both parents have covert narcissist personality disorder.
In the intricate web of family dynamics, the role of each member plays a crucial part in shaping individual identities and emotional well-being. In families with covert narcissistic parents, one common and deeply impactful role is that of the scapegoat child.
You are the target of blame, criticism, and emotional manipulation, serving as a diversion for the narcissistic parent’s insecurities and need for constant control.
A covert narcissistic parent operates under a facade of humility and selflessness, making it challenging for outsiders to identify their toxic behaviors. Behind closed doors, they engage in subtle manipulation, emotional exploitation, and a persistent need for validation. The scapegoat child becomes the unfortunate outlet for the parent’s unresolved issues and cruelty.
The dynamics within narcissists families are characterized by an unhealthy power imbalance. The covert narcissistic parent projects their shortcomings onto the scapegoat child, attributing their failures and frustrations to this vulnerable family member.
As a result, the scapegoat child is burdened with an overwhelming sense of guilt, shame, and inadequacy, leading to long-term emotional scars.
One defining characteristic of the scapegoat role is the constant shifting of blame. The covert narcissistic parent deflects responsibility for their actions onto the scapegoat, who becomes a convenient target for all familial problems. This not only shields the narcissistic parent from accountability but also reinforces their sense of superiority and righteousness.
The scapegoat child experiences a range of emotional and psychological challenges, including low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, and a pervasive feeling of being unlovable.
This role persists into adulthood, impacting your ability to form healthy relationships and maintain your positive self-image.
Breaking free from the scapegoat role requires a deep understanding of the dynamics at play and a commitment to healing.Learning and growing on your own terms to create your sustainable platform of calm and your calming box tools.
Seeking therapy and support can be instrumental in untangling the emotional knots created by the covert narcissistic parent. It is crucial for the scapegoat child to recognize they are not the source of the family’s dysfunction and to reclaim their identity, free from the burdens imposed upon them.
Understanding the dynamics of the scapegoat child in families with covert narcissistic parents sheds light on the intricate and damaging nature of these relationships. Recognizing the impact of these dynamics is the first step toward breaking free from the cycle and fostering your emotional healing and growth. Creating your calm and contentment for a lifetime of peace and acceptance of yourself.