Calming Box Listening Holding Space

Feeling unheard by others around you can be a painful experience. As humans, we need to experience acknowledgement and validation in order to feel valued, so when this doesn’t happen, it’s normal to feel rejected, neglected or invisible.

Conversations can turn into a battleground of opinions. When someone shares their thoughts, it becomes a natural instinct to prepare for our turn to speak, to defend or affirm. 

The true essence of communication lies in the ability to listen actively and empathetically. Build your calming box of a foundation of calm by rather than immediately crafting a response based on agreement or disagreement, we should strive to hold space for the other person’s perspective. 

This involves resisting the urge to interject with our own opinions and instead, fostering an environment where their thoughts can unfold naturally.

One effective way to do this is by asking follow-up questions, after waiting for the other person to stop and look at you.

These questions demonstrate a genuine interest in understanding the nuances of the other person’s viewpoint. 

By delving deeper into their thoughts, we create an opportunity for them to elaborate on their experiences, feelings, and beliefs.

Defaulting to curiosity can be a refreshing approach. It is more relaxing for all parties and leads to more peace and contentment.

Instead of preparing counterarguments,ask questions like “What led you to feel that way?” or “What experiences shaped your perspective?” These inquiries allow the person to expand on their thoughts and open  the path for a more meaningful and enriching conversation.

The goal is to move beyond the habit of making every interaction about ourselves. It’s about recognizing the value in the other person’s experiences and perspectives. Listening actively is a powerful way to build connections and bridge gaps, fostering a deeper understanding of one another.

To truly connect with someone, we need to embrace the practice of holding space for their narrative without immediately resorting to story-topping, correcting, or arguing. 

This approach encourages an environment of mutual respect, where individuals can share their truths without fear of judgment.

The art of listening and holding space involves more than waiting for our turn to speak. It requires a conscious effort to prioritize curiosity over confrontation, creating a space where every perspective is acknowledged and valued. By embracing this approach, we open doors to richer conversations, deeper connections, and a more harmonious exchange of ideas in our increasingly diverse and interconnected world.In a world where disagreement often leads to confrontation.

Feeling unheard by others around you can be a painful experience. As humans, we need to experience acknowledgement and validation in order to feel valued, so when this doesn’t happen, it’s normal to feel rejected, neglected or invisible.

If you find someone willing to practice listening, keep going. It may be as simple as an exercise in holding a talking stick where everyone gets turn. Keep the pace slow so everyone can gently build their foundation of calming by using all the tools in their calming box.